Losing someone you love is never easy. What is so difficult to me is knowing I will never be able to touch my sweet sister again. I will never be able to smell her again, never hear her voice again, look into her eyes, simply be in her presence. Those moments have simply faded away.
One of the greatest gifts we were blessed with in those final days was being given those moments. I was able to write her “My letter to an Angel” and be present with her there “in the here and now.” I could hold her , cry with her, touch her, smell her and FEEL her in that moment. Even in the end when she became unresponsive, I was able to go and sit by her bedside. I could hold her hand , watch and feel her heart beating. Sometimes I would doze off next to her and that was OK because I was still THERE.
Memories are a wonderful thing. It is all we have left when God calls our loved ones home. We must cling to those memories and hold them dear so we do not forget. I am so grateful God has blessed me with as many wonderful memories as He has. In the coming days I pray my heart will come to accept that the moments we were given, that seem to have faded into only memories so quickly, were given to us now to cherish in this time of great sorrow.
Then, as I sit here in my loneliness, aching for the presence of my beautiful sister, I am reminded once again that SHE is standing in the presence of her LORD! Nothing could be more magnificent or memorable for her than that! Her once broken body is now free. She is once again whole. I picture here dancing and singing in His presence. This is what will sustain me and be locked into my memory forever. What a glorious time she is having being in the presence of Jesus “in the here and now.” I can only imagine!
LORIE VINCENT – August 24, 1963 ~ September 3, 2015
As I gaze out into the warm summer night and feel the tender breeze upon my face, I am reminded that the twinkling stars above are not nearly as vibrant as the twinkle that I see as I look into your eyes. Eyes so deep. Black as ebony, yet so loving, soft and tender. In those eyes I see the reflection of the person who lives inside you. The kind, gentle loving spirit you are becomes so clear to me once again.
As I continue to sit here basking in the moonlight, memories of our youth flood my mind. Such happy times, so young, so carefree. Nothing could touch us then. Our whole lives were ahead of us. Where did those days go? How is it that we have come to this day, this time? I am not ready for this to end, this adventure we share, this journey we call life.
I remember a day, a time where long pretty nails were buried deep into my flesh. Oh how I wanted to stick that fork I chased after you with deep into your flesh! I laugh now remembering such a time in our youth.
Then there was the time many years later I watched you lead our group of friends into a time of prayer and worship, a time of studying the Word of God. Oh how I wanted to be like you. So grounded, so mature, so steadfast in your walk with Christ. Tears fill my eyes now remembering such a time as this.
As more years passed I remember the day came for you to head off to college and leave our family and begin to make a new life for yourself. You probably never knew how sad I was to be losing my big sister. I was going to miss you so much but somehow I knew it would be OK. You had always been there for me and I would use what you taught me to be a better person. One day I’d go off to college myself and be just like you.
And then suddenly there you were. My beautiful sister, all dressed in white standing beside the man you chose to spend your life with. I’d never seen you look so happy. You had chosen well and I knew that from that day on you would forever be taken care of and loved the way you deserved to be loved. I admired you so. Always so level headed. You knew what you wanted and you did whatever it took to make your dreams come true.
It did not take long and you were a mother. I’ll never forget the way you loved your kids. There was nothing or no one who could ever tell you more wonderful things about them then you could ever say about them yourself. I knew someday I too would be a parent. I only hoped I could do half as good a job raising my sons as you did raising your kids. Is it any wonder that you would be just as wonderful a grandmother? Your little granddaughters adore their “Mema” so much!
And now here you are today. All grown up, reaping the rewards of a life well lived. It has been more than a joy walking through the years of our youth together. It has been my greatest privilege sharing my life as an adult with you, my big sister, the one I have always looked up to, admired, emulated, loved and cherished.
Once again, as it was all those years ago when you began your journey to independence, I am saddened beyond comprehension to be losing my big sister. I’m going to miss you so much. How can I make it without you? You’re my sister, but more than that, you are one of my best friends. You have always been there for me……… helped me see things more clearly, calmed me down, built me up……..simply loved me.
I can only, once again, take everything you have taught me and use it to be a better person, a better husband, a better father, a better son, a better brother, a better friend.
You will always and forever live in my heart. When I close my eyes I will see you…….feel you. When I gaze into the stars and feel the warm gentle breeze on my face I know you will be there with me. You have always been and always will be my angel in heaven and no words on earth could ever convey to you the love I have and always will have for you.
So go now my sweet sister, my angel in heaven. Be at rest. Be at peace. Listen to and embrace the words, “Well done my Good and Faithful servant.” Spread your wings and fly……………. straight into the arms of God.
Life is precious. It is a gift from God. It is not to be taken for granted. It is a blessing. To whom much is given, much is expected. I honestly believe it is up to us to do the very best with what we have been blessed with.
Good morning pain…..actually there is nothing “good” about it……..and yet we meet again. You’re such a self-centered one aren’t you? You’re always thinking about yourself. You have no regard for me or my needs. You don’t care that I was finally sleeping soundly. Your desires needed to be met so you just callously woke me up because you demanded to be heard.
As I lay here in the quiet tranquility of the night, I reminisce of days gone by and of a life well lived.
In life there will always be 2 kinds of people who come our way………
-Those who support us
-Those who don’t
Those who support you are the one’s you need to never take for granted. Love them always and Pray for God to Bless them.